Being Practical is NOT Practical
How could I have been living by intuition and then go in the opposite direction—live more “logically”?
I’ve been going through a bit of a strange journey this past year, where I began to question my spiritual way of navigating the physical world. Ever since my awakening, I have been spending money by intuition and cutting back work to prioritize myself. I knew my finances at the time were a bit ungrounded but I kept receiving messages from my guide that everything will be okay. Yet I began to question the flow state I was in. That perhaps I needed to control my situation more to get ahead, by limiting what I bought and how I spent my time; I started to compromise certain things like not buying organic food for the first time in years, for instance. I thought this was me trying to balance out my spiritual life with a more practical way of living. I kept hearing other spiritualist talk about this, to be practical yet spiritual. I am not saying to go full blast into higher realms, rather, when you are highly grounded as I was during that time, you can react to intuitive insights even when they do not fit a linear timeline. Yet, I challenged my intuition, my heart, by not fully believing in it, which was also tied to my self worth. It uncovered a much deeper level of not believing I am truly worthy enough to have an easier life, that things can be handed to me. Because of my doubts, I started to wind myself back up and live a more “practical” life. I began to live the life the average person does, which we so normalize in our society—working a job to get by, planning our lives, worrying. I became far more stressed than I needed to be. And above all, just unhappy and exhausted.
I’ve taken the last couple of months to reflect, slow down. How could I have been living by intuition and then go in the opposite direction—live more “logically”? You see though, this was a part of my Dark Night of the Soul. I had thought that last year I had finished a year and a half long cycle into the Dark Night; but as I had recently learned from my guides, I was actually still in it and that I am now at the very end of the cycle about to be reborn (thank god). This journey through the Dark Night of the Soul has been very interesting. At points it felt like I was living within a paradox. As I had been uncovering what seemed like every negative belief system within myself, I was feeling more sour, more angry, I was also doing a lot of clearing. I questioned my original foundation, rebuilt, and my vibration rose. I felt my aura expand, though at the same time I had limited contact with people, I also felt like people were beginning to really pay attention to me, without extending anything out of myself.
By going in the opposite direction, I feel I now have more clarity and less doubt about actively choosing to live through my intuition/my heart space.
By going in the opposite direction, I feel I now have more clarity and less doubt about actively choosing to live through my intuition/my heart space. The thing is, is that I have become so in tune that I don’t need to check my bank account to know that I have enough money or watch the news to find out who the next president will be or check the GPS to figure out the best route. That by leading life through the heart, all answers are found. Even if the guidance you receive may not seem reasonable or financially stable. I have learned that by choosing to act upon your heart actually is the answer to abundance both spiritually (your mind and health) and physically (finance and security). And for me, it also wasn’t necessarily about trusting my own intuition, but to receive the outcome in which my intuition was guiding me towards. That I am worthy of receiving what I truly wanted in the world and accepting the beauty within myself. The signs kept pointing back to me—that I am loved—and it was hard to accept that at the time.
If you haven’t read Yogananda’s “Diary of a Yogi,” please do. It is proof that living from your heart creates an unlimited path.
No matter how absurd your dreams or your desires are, as long as you follow the pull within you and believe all is working for you from a place of love, the life you dream can be attained. Yet often times, it is within those desires that springs a newly realized hold within ourselves, thus preventing us from moving forward. Look deep into this fear. For me, this fear was about love. And the fear that if I choose to live from my heart, my intuition, I could face rejection. The fear is only the ego’s way of closing the gate from the thing you actually want. Open that gate. Act upon it. It may mean cutting down your work hours or quitting altogether or stepping into a different lane than you’re used to or exposing your truth. It can feel uncomfortable at first. But the universe, God, does not punish; rather, choosing love only gives you more love. Even if the outcome is not immediate, and by moving through a heart centered space, we also move into a nonlinear way of being. You will begin to realize that 2 + 2 no longer equals 4. If you haven’t read Yogananda’s “Diary of a Yogi,” please do. It is proof that living from your heart creates an unlimited path. Especially for those who may feel like they walk this path alone. This book proves to the skeptics that life is unlimited. That YOU are unlimited. Yogananda never approached life through checking boxes; rather, trusting God and leading by his belief of universal TRUTH. His stories and of other yogi’s and saints, including Jesus, inspires all of us to fully surrender. Still. And for a more modern day proof of trusting the universe/God, I highly recommend reading “The Surrender Experiment” by Michael Singer.
All we have to do is let go. And trust. Stop giving power to the logical mind and start to feel into the answers and solutions. Harness the worth within yourself—know that you can have it all. And so it is.
